How-To Hoe Down #1: Projects for Baling Twine Hoarders

    Maybe this is a good time to teach you the secret art of reusing baling twine. Our bales are in small, 50ish pound rectangles bound tightly with two orange lengths of twine. I don't really understand how the mechanical baler ties those knots. I think there are little elves inside. The twine itself is some sort of polyvinyl petroleum product that will outlast us all. So, it's important to find secondary uses for them once you've snipped those ties with the nearest handy sharp object and tossed the desiccated grass to your eager ruminants.

Small bales for a small farm.

Future archaeological find.

        The first step is to collect the twine in a designated place so it is ready for whatever future project you need it for. Do not leave the twine in any grass, lettuce patch, blackberry bramble or other plant matter where it will become entangled and lost until the lawnmower finds it. I would never do that. Likewise, don't leave it on the barn floor to trip your spouse or drape it across their bike wheel or the cab of their truck or under their pillow. And, in seriousness, don't leave it where your animals will eat it because it can block their intestines. I've heard some sad stories.

       The second step is to make some stuff with your twine. Here are some ideas:

The Starfighter makes sense. Keep reading.

    1. Tomato trellis. This design can be used for a single or double row of tomatoes. It is a build-as-it-grows design and will end up looking like a crazy twine-spinning spider has made its web through your maters. Pruning the leaves off the center of your plant will help air flow and prevent mold.

These plants are starting to overgrow the center stake. Next step will be to tie them to twine from the top.

These taller vines are wound around the high twine and the wider branches are restrained. The twine spider is getting busy. These plants are also watered with an olla (only filled every 3 days during this extreme heat wave) and pruned in the middle. Notice there are no yellow or wilting leaves and no signs of mold. The mulch is dried California poppy. Click the photo to see some videos I made about ollas and poppies. Stay tuned for info about our sheet mulch technique.

           Instructions: Plant your tomato starts in either a single or double row. Take five garden stakes (bamboo or plastic) or five strong sticks (dig through last year's pruning pile) and build the basic framework along your tomato bed. To do this, push two stakes into the ground at one end of your tomato row. Push them in towards each other at about a 30 degree angle so they meet to form an X. The angle is approximate and depends on the length of your stakes and the width of your beds. The goal is to make the top of the X just as wide as the bottom but not so wide that it will block your path. There's nothing like a bracing stick in the eye to really wake you up in the morning. Next, lay (or lie? Get used to me abusing those words) your third stake along the bed just to measure where the second X should go in the ground. Leave some room for overlap. Once you have both Xs in the ground, lay/lie that third stake so it rests on the centers of the Xs. You should have something that resembles a stick figure drawing of the Galactic Empire's TIE Starfighter. Now use about half a length of baling twine to tightly secure each X to the center stake and let the other half dangle freely. Loosely wrap the dangly end around your tomato plant, winding it around whichever branch you choose to be the main runner, and tie it loosely to the base of the plant. If you have more tomato plants along the row, tie them the same way along the length of the center stake. You can expand the X frame along the length of the tomato row as long as you need it to be, just place another X wherever your center stakes meet (like a whole fleet of Starfighters lined up end on end). Leave yourself an ample pile of baling twine near the bed so you can continue to tie up the plants as they grow. You will soon need to lead the vines higher than the center stake. To do this, tie baling twine from the top of one stake to another, forming a rectangle of twine at the top of your frame. This rectangle needs to maintain the width of your Xs as well as support the weight of the tomato plants as they grow, so tie it tightly. Consider using more stakes for that top rectangle if you're growing big, heavy slicers or if you get strong wind. Finally, tie full lengths of baling twine from the rectangle down to the base of each plant. Wind the main runner of the plant around the twine to guide it vertically as it grows. If your vines grow longer than the height of the frame, just guide it back down with another length of twine (or sideways along the top rectangle). Secondary branches can be corralled in by tying more twine to the center stake and the Xs and looping it around the plant.

     2. Plan a Straight Fence Line: The shortest distance from Point A to Point B sometimes needs a map.
    Instructions: Push stakes in the ground where your corner posts will be (Points A and B). Tie lengths of baling twine together into one long rope. Tie the rope to the stakes. Voila. You can also use this to plant straight garden rows if you are a control freak as well as an obsessive compulsive baling twine hoarder. I wouldn't know about either of those things, obviously.  

Twine line makes a straight line.

Stay tuned for our red neck fence tensioning system.

     3. Crochet a Rug.  Need a primitive, chabby chic, utilitarianique (my term, copyrighted) place to wipe off your Wellies?
    Instructions: Baling twine is sturdy stuff. Tie the lengths together and wind the whole rope into a ball. Learn to crochet (just ask Granny).  Crochet a rug. Don't worry about the long ties. They add character.

(Pretend I took a picture of a baling twine rug. At this point, it's still in the design phase...)

    4. Use Baling Twine for Everything Else. Tie a sack closed. Keep a gate open. Keep a gate closed. Cinch a bed roll. Wrap a present. Tie your hair back. Replace the leash your dog lost. Play chase with your cat. Make a peanut butter rap trat, I mean rat trap. Tie a tarp down. Cinch up your fat pants that are only good for gardening now. Expand the buttonhole of your skinny pants. Hang a cabbage for your chickens to peck. Zigzag twine through the holes of a cattle panel to keep your bull-headed alpaca from sticking his head through and getting it stuck. Curse the twine and the alpaca when it doesn't work. Crochet a hammock. Weave a basket. Patch the cane of your old chair. Embroider a detailed replica of the unicorn tapestries. Give it to your kids and tell them to go outside and use their imagination.

    I hope this How-To Hoe Down has inspired you to hoard twine like a pro and justify that hoard to your spouse and perhaps remind them of their own torn up T-shirt hoard if they still give you grief. See you next time.